The things we do to “belong”. From time immemorial or the deep fat psychology textbooks. People often present themselves in a particular way to belong to a specific social group. This social…
When I was in the beginning of my senior year of high school, one of my favorite teachers called me “whiney”. Now, it wasn’t out of context. A few friends, her and I were sitting around talking about personalities. When I asked what they thought of when they thought of me, they said words like little, kind, smart, quiet, but most importantly,
I was shocked. As a child, I was a complete ham. I was outgoing, I spoke out for what I believed in. There’s a home video of me when I was seven: I had choreographed a whole dance for my cousins and myself. I was obviously the star (typical me), and my cousins were my backup dancers. i was so meticulous with the movements; I knew exactly how the dance needed to be done, and I made sure it got done that way.
In fifth grade, we were going on a diversity field trip, and one kid said he wasn’t going because he didn’t want to be with the black kids. As a fifth grader, I told him he was a baby, and stupid for not going. I did not apologize, because I knew that racism was wrong.
In seventh grade, I was sitting in science class with my lab partner, who happened to be a friend of mine. The boys behind us were snickering and it was rather annoying, so I turned around and asked what they were laughing at. They said they were laughing at my friend because of her weight. I stood up, yelled at them, and made those boys apologize to my friend.
Where did that strong little girl go? When had I stopped standing up for things I believed in? When had I turned into a quiet, whiney little thing?
So I made it a point to change. I was going to reinvent myself. It was not a quick process. I made a long list of things I could do to make people take me seriously, respect me, and think of me as a strong independent woman.
Throughout my senior year, I made these changes:
People started to notice. My friend Tim, who would once walk all over me, was taken aback when I told him I would not drive him across town because it was out of my way. My friends were surprised when I asked for gas money. My parents were surprised when I told them I wanted to go to college two hours away instead of the state school that was around the corner.
I started to like myself so much more. I think people were enjoying being around me more, and more importantly, I enjoyed being around me. I was having so much fun making myself into this knew person!
Years have gone by now, and I still strive to improve myself. I still stand up for things I believe in, I don’t let people walk all over me, and I make it a point to be a good role model in my community.
I never asked my teacher at the end of the year if she noticed a difference. But if I had to describe myself now, I would use these words:
Little, kind, intelligent, well-spoken, mature, independent, and strong as hell.
The purpose of this post was not at all to brag about how far I’ve come; I wanted to start out with my example so that I can show all of you that change is very possible. I am in no way an expert, but I think I have a few tricks up my sleeve to becoming a new you. That is, if you so incline to be. I may also have a few tips about self care, dealing with anxiety and depression, and even some boy tips. So tune in. :)
Vejo aqueles documentários do GNT sobre adoção, alimentação, amor e me dá náuseas, tudo cheira a groselha. Algumas chamadas do programa sobre poliamor me davam a sensação de que, apesar das…
Near as can be told the “Seven Classical Propaganda Techniques” were first codified in an uncredited article in the second issue of “Propaganda Analysis” from 1937. This was just a small…
Discover the captivating journey of K-pop culture, its impact on the world, and the complex dynamics of fetishization, Orientalism, cultish fan communities, anti-fan sentiments, and parasocial…