Monotony

A Poem

I open my eyes every morning
with delusional forgetfulness
of the plight we are all in
Another day at home
with the same general schedule,
the same regular meals,
the same feeling of humdrum
and personal malaise
and while I do my best
to appreciate all that I have
it doesn’t make me less bored
with the unstrung monotony
currently calcifying my life

New day, new show
New day, new project that
I will carefully avoid completing
because then I would need
to start another one
and finishing anything right now
is so underwhelming and unsatisfying
that it almost feels better
to add to my to-do list
so there is more to do
while I am still tucked away,
in parental solitude,
wondering if this is
the very definition of ennui

Sweatpants or shorts,
cereal or waffle,
Earl Grey or Darjeeling,
these are the top questions
that plague my morning
and cause serious rumination
because why not?
I have the time
All I have is time right now,
that, and the backtalk from
the person in the mirror
who keeps telling me
that I could be less bored
if I accomplished more
and that my pandemic mindset
is contextually negative
or the sound of a flatline

Read a book, listen to a podcast
Watch a MasterClass, cook something
Learn something, meditate
Spend all day online
clicking from here to there
but going absolutely nowhere…

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